Listen, muse...you're really slackin'!

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Listen, muse...you're really slackin'!

Written by Melody Jones

Friday, 19 March 2010 20:48

Writers who actually earn a living writing often warn beginners that it doesn’t matter whether or not the writing muse is visiting you. You still have to write.

Not feeling energetic? So.

No ideas? Better get some cuz daylight’s burning.

Humor non-existent because life has got you down? Isn’t humor often based on life’s tragedies? Uh…find something funny in your horrible life.

That last one is me. And I’m pissed cuz nothing is funny right now. Life sucks dude.

Well, there was that situation last night where the wife/dog mama found herself jerked awake from a deep sleep by the fragrant combined emissions of two dogs and one husband (because girls don’t toot – everybody knows that). In fact, it was so fragrant and ever-present, that the wife/dog mama was forced to retire to the guest room where she keeps the bed made up for just such emergencies. A fresh-smelling girl has got to have her beauty sleep.

And then life butted back in and made her depressed. Is there a reason why things cannot JUST WORK OUT?? Do dreams have to be bashed?

But I digress. I blame muse. Muse is not here helping me write something funny. Muse is off partying or sleeping or basking on a beach or some crap leaving me here with depression and fragrant dogs. And laundry.

Damn it, now I have to worry about laundry. Is laundry ever humorous? Oh yeah, I sure do enjoy it when I wash screws, coins, receipts, pens, chapstick, flash drives, dog toy remnants, inside-out socks, lipstick, various tools, Jolly Rancher candy wrappers, Kleenex, fig newtons and entire wallets. And the occasional $5 bill that buys my next Caramel Macchiato at the closest Starbucks. (Have I mentioned that I do not have children?) (Have I also mentioned that I love my coffee?) (Additionally, have I mentioned that I love $5 bills?)

Now where was I. Oh yes. Depression. Crushed dreams. Laundry. Life sucks dude. Fragrant emissions.

And muse is on vacation.

Last Updated on Saturday, 20 March 2010 13:52

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10 Comments

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byfaithonly makes this comment

Friday, 19 March 2010

Oh dear sorry to hear you are down but ya know what you still managed to make me smile - 'fragrant emissions' never heard it put that way but do think it's funny.... (((((Melody)))))
Peachyqueen makes this comment

Saturday, 20 March 2010

Maybe you should just go with the muse on vacation next time. Stick you feet in the water, feel the fresh ocean breeze and have a lot of margaritas!!
Melissa makes this comment

Saturday, 20 March 2010

I know that I enjoy washing (and then drying) red crayons! I agree with Peachyqueen, next time, take a vacation with your muse and drink heavily!
Melody makes this comment

Saturday, 20 March 2010

Patty, let's both go stick our feet in the water somewhere! Faith and Melissa, thank you for reading and commenting!
saramomof2 makes this comment

Saturday, 20 March 2010

You ALWAYS know how to make me smile. Love your posts, this one really rocks!
Melody makes this comment

Saturday, 20 March 2010

Thank you Sara, that means a lot! Especially since this one was kinda tough to write cuz the muse really was absent
Christy Cross makes this comment

Wednesday, 24 March 2010

2 margaritas and call me in the morning....
jskelton makes this comment

Saturday, 27 March 2010

*hugs* Hey, even those of us who tell you to whip your arse into shape have off days.
CindyTeenAdvice makes this comment

Sunday, 28 March 2010

This is great, I can always count on your articles to make me smile
GrundyPumpett makes this comment

Sunday, 28 March 2010

Ahhhhhh...
play the gray...dark-light, black-white
boil ice, freeze steam...the waking dream
stalls this way or that...drat!

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